Actors You Can’t Stand

I pooped on Katherine Heigl's face

We all have them, actors that we simply can’t stand to watch. Simply seeing their face appear on screen is enough to make us gag in disgust and we will purposely avoid a movie they are in even if everyone tells us it’s a good flick. It’s hard to explain because we usually can’t stand those actors for no good reason. Sure, we might justify it by reasoning that we hate them because they are overhyped, untalented or not classy. But the truth of the matter is there are many other actors who are just as overrated or lacking talent, yet we don’t despise them nearly as much. Hence, the question of the week is: What actors do you hate and why?

Castor: Personally, I almost never write off an actor. I always try to remain open and pull for people to surprise me. Will Jessica Alba ever learn to act? Will Keanu Reeves turn into an actual block of wood? Those are rhetorical questions that need not be answered at this point but I don’t hate them for that. Now that said, I absolutely loath Jack Black. I simply cannot stand his wild, obnoxious act that he seems to put on everywhere he appears. He singlehandedly managed to almost ruin otherwise perfectly solid movies such as The School of Rock and Tropic Thunder and I absolutely refuse to watch the vast majority of movies he is in.

Someone else I just can’t stand for incredibly shallow reasons is Sarah Jessica Parker. I’m sorry for what I’m about to say but her face makes me want to dig through concrete with my bare hands so I can hide and never see her horse face ever again! While we are at it, let’s also add Katherine Heigl because aside from playing the same character over and over again in atrocious movies, her off-screen persona just screams of no class.

Obviously, I don’t know Jack Black, Sarah Jessica Parker or Katherine Heigl. They could be the nicest and coolest people on Earth for what I know but this is a truly fascinating topic to reflect on because while I can’t stand watching those 3 movie stars, there may be hordes of fans out there who admire and follow their every moves. In the same vein, while I sing the praises of my favorite actors such as Christian Bale or Rachel McAdams, there is probably people out there who are hating their guts! Fascinating topic, isn’t it?

Red hates that face, he hates it!

Red: Of all the actors out there, the one that I can’t stand the most is Daniel Craig. Never before have I heard so much support for a guy who simply makes the same face over and over again and calls it acting. If I knew all I had to do to get into acting was pucker my lips and look tough for every frame of the movie and still receive critical acclaim, I would’ve left for Hollywood ages ago! What makes matters even worse is that he keeps popping up in movies that I would have anticipated otherwise. “Cowboys and Aliens”, “The Golden Compass” and Fincher’s “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo”. I’m not exactly a huge Bond fan, but I still remember being heartbroken that he was chosen for the series over Clive Owen. I notice the irony in that last statement since most people make the same accusations against Owen as I just did against Craig, but to each his own.

As for actresses go, that’s a little tougher. After pondering for a while, my initial instinct went for Annette Bening, but that was mostly due to the political mishappenings of this year’s Oscar race. Instead, I’ll go with a much younger and easier target, Keira Knightley. While I will admit she wasn’t half bad in “Atonement”, and that her delivery of ”You want pain? Try wearing a corset” in Pirates always gives me a chuckle, I find the rest of her work rather underwhelming. Maybe it’s because I don’t find her all that attractive as most people do? She has several distracting facial features, whether it is the bushy eyebrows or the underbite that at times makes it appear as if she is toothless, she is just an actress that I have never been able to take seriously.

Your turn to vent your irrational hate for someone you have never even met! Which actors do you hate for no good reason (or good ones)? Let it be known in the comments below!

The question of the week is an opportunity for you to open up and reveal more about yourself and your movie taste. Have a question you would like us and the readers to answer? E-mail me at castor@anomalousmaterial.com